Mid-Autumn Festival doesn't necessarily bring happiness.

　　Today is the Mid-Autumn Festival. As a traditional festival, I, as a Chinese citizen, should be enjoying this day happily. However, I don't feel happy at all.

　　The first thing is that before going to my maternal grandparents' house, I went with my cousin and her husband. My cousin's husband drove my cousin to her hometown to visit her grandparents. When I saw my cousin's grandfather, I didn't know how to address him, but I still politely called him "Grandpa." Unfortunately, my cousin's grandfather didn't respond. I didn't feel like I was being ignored; I just felt very awkward.

　　I'm a girl, and my menstrual flow is so heavy that my pants got soiled. This made me restless at my maternal grandparents' house. Since my pants got dirty, I kept thinking about going home to change them.

　　Finally, in the afternoon, I got home, only to find out that my grandmother had asked my cousin to bring me a black chicken and black beans to nourish my body, as she'd heard black chicken is good for the brain. So, without my knowledge, my cousin took the black chicken to my grandmother's house and even called me to tell me that the chicken had arrived, without asking if I agreed. My younger sister, on the other hand, took the black beans to my grandmother's house. Before leaving my maternal grandmother's house, I refused to take any chickens or ducks with me because I felt it wouldn't look proper to carry a chicken or duck around when I went to the supermarket to buy women's products.

　　Then, when I went to my grandmother's house for dinner that evening, I unintentionally learned from her that my cousin had taken the black chicken there. I also unintentionally learned that the black chicken had already been killed when I arrived for dinner. What

　　embarrassed me the most was the phone call from my mother. When she learned that the black chicken had been killed, she sounded very angry on the phone, saying that my grandmother was incompetent and that I should bring the black beans first thing in the morning so that my grandmother could steam the black chicken for me to have for breakfast. But my grandmother planned to steam the black chicken along with the rice the next morning.

　　The disagreement between Grandma and Mother over the black chicken has left me feeling conflicted. I feel like I can't listen to either of them, and I realize that sometimes, no matter what, my mother and I can't agree. I think that regardless of whether Grandma's quick action of killing the black chicken was right or wrong, she is at least an elder, and as a junior, I should respect her. I also know that Grandma wanted me to bring the black chicken home for my own good, but I really don't like the way my family treats me like a fragile thing, always needing to be pampered. I really don't like that, and most importantly, I don't like holding chickens or ducks in my hands, let alone bringing them home.

　　This Mid-Autumn Festival, I didn't eat any mooncakes, nor did I feel happy; all I felt was a deep sense of helplessness.

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