"When you're feeling down, don't always try to chat with someone."

1. When you're sad, never always talk to someone.  

There's a saying: "Don't cry in front of others, and don't make any decisions late at night."

To add to that, when you're sad, never always talk to someone.

Have you ever felt this way? When your mood hits rock bottom, and a mix of emotions overwhelms you, you always think that sharing with someone will make you feel better. Later, you'll find that sharing your sadness doesn't lessen it; instead, it makes it worse.

Let me share a little story with you:

When I first started working after graduating from school, I was unfamiliar with everything. There was no one to guide me in my department, and no dedicated training. I had to figure out the work my supervisor gave me by trial and error, often making mistakes and getting scolded.

Once, I was having lunch with a colleague and cried about my pressure and helplessness, but unexpectedly, my colleague mocked me.

I had hoped to relieve some pressure, but my colleague's sarcastic remarks made me even sadder.

"When you're sad, don't tell your misfortunes like someone in distress. Because people who don't understand you don't understand or care about your hardships and situation."

Sharing your sadness with the wrong people will only bring more trouble.

(Hmm... Back then, I had a relationship with someone I thought was pretty good, so I told him about all my work troubles. At first, he analyzed things for me, but later...? Actually, I've forgotten what those troubles were about, but I still remember... he replied, "Because all I get from you is negative energy." After that, I secretly told myself not to tell others everything bad, to process it myself.)

"I could have tolerated the darkness if I had never seen the sun." Even if you share your sadness with the right people, after the crowd leaves, you don't become stronger, but rather more vulnerable.

What's worse than having no one to comfort you is still having to face life's hardships alone after the comfort. If you always rely on external comfort for security, it will only make it harder for you to endure the darkness.

Growing up is the process of becoming a team from being alone. There are always some roads you have to walk alone, and some hardships you have to endure alone.

The more mature you become, the more you understand that unimportant people are not enough to share your sadness, and you can't bear to let important people worry.

Choosing to face negative emotions selectively and alone is not about pessimistically suppressing them, but about actively processing them and maturely taking a more relaxed view of life's many disappointments.

When you're unhappy, go for a run alone, watch a movie, read a book, or take a nap. Actually, many things aren't a big deal.

And it's said that a person's limit for sadness is five days. (You can try it! ⊙∀⊙!)

It's sad, it's difficult, but it will eventually pass.

  2. Adults need the strength to embrace themselves  

. There was a debate topic on the show "Qipa Talk": Living away from home, I'm unhappy. Should I tell my parents?

If you had the choice, would you tell them?

I think most people would choose not to.

Whether to parents or other relatives and friends, reporting only good news and hiding the bad, embellishing the situation, is a way for most adults to protect their love and themselves.

I wholeheartedly agree with a quote from the program: "As adults, we must embrace ourselves. Only when you have the strength to embrace yourself can you embrace everyone else."

As a friend, only when you have the ability to comfort yourself can you have the capacity to offer help in times of need.

As a child, only when you manage your own emotions can you have the confidence to provide your parents with a peaceful and joyful later life.

As a parent, only when you manage your own life well can you allow your children to grow up happily in a stable and healthy environment.

As a human being, only when you have the ability to embrace yourself, unafraid of the cold and loneliness, can you truly embrace the warmth of this world.

As Zang Hongfei said on the show:

Everyone living in the city has a moment when they want to pick up the phone and call home, saying, "I can't take it anymore." I believe everyone does.

But one day, you pick up the phone and don't call. This means you realize you have to face these unhappy things. Congratulations, you've become more suited to living in this city.

I especially admire this "take it or leave it" attitude towards life.

If you're not brave, no one will be strong for you.

When we learn to pick up the phone to face difficult times, and then put it down without complaining, it not only means that those who love you have less worry and helplessness, but also that you have more courage to confront reality.

When life is tough, remember to smile and tell yourself that after hardship comes happiness.

When things aren't going well, remember to relax and tell yourself that at least things are better now than before...

Accept it, change it, and silently grow upwards. When you are strong enough, all difficulties will seem smaller.

May you be able to take up all the beauty in the world and let go of all the troubles of life.

  3. Regularly clear out your emotional baggage; nothing is insurmountable.  

There's a familiar saying from the story of the little monk Yichan:

A piece of sugar in water won't be too sweet, but a spoonful of vinegar will make it very sour; finding money won't make you too happy, but losing it will cause you immense regret. A person can't be happy for a whole year because of one good thing, but can be depressed for a lifetime because of one trauma. The stimulation from pain is always far greater than that of happiness.

We tend to magnify our negative emotions and easily become immersed in pain. Only by untying our knots and stepping out of "misfortune" can we generate joy.

Recently, there's been a popular story online.

A donkey fell into a trap, and its owner, finding it too difficult to rescue, abandoned it.

Even worse, people started dumping garbage into the trap every day.

The donkey initially felt depressed and resentful every day. Why? Why did its owner abandon it? Why did others dump garbage on it?

But fate didn't grant it any hope because of its resentment; the garbage in the trap piled higher and higher each day.

Suddenly one day, the donkey realized that to survive, it had to save itself.

So, every day it searched for food in the garbage, then trampled the garbage under its feet, bit by bit. By fighting against this in this way, it finally succeeded in using the garbage as stepping stones to escape the trap.

Life will always have its share of hardships; we will always encounter many unpredictable troubles. You can't wake someone who is pretending to be asleep, and you can't survive indefinitely by avoiding problems.

Never imprison yourself in sorrow; only by saving yourself can you see a new turning point; only by regularly clearing the garbage from your heart can you embrace a new beginning.

  4. Give yourself a reason to be happy every day.  

Whenever I'm unhappy, I read this quote from Tong Hua: "

Sadness is sadness, and despair is despair. Sadness is because of the past, but despair destroys the future. Never mistake despair for sadness and let the future be buried with the past.

Life is about living in the present, and the hope for the future is ignited by you in the present.

No matter what, learn to make peace with yourself, don't amplify bad emotions, and don't make things difficult for yourself.

Change your mindset, and you'll find a new path; change your perspective, and everything is for the best; even bad things can turn into good things."

May you, even on the toughest days, find a reason to be happy every day.

Eat something you like, see someone you like, do something you want to do. If life is too bitter, treat yourself to a lollipop.

May you, even on the better days, live each day with passion.

Lift your left foot and walk the path you want to walk earnestly; lift your right foot and live the life you want earnestly. May

every step be firm as a rock, and every day be worthwhile.

Then, I'd like to share a quote I really like from Li Dan: "

Cheer up, friends, life isn't worth it ."

Finally, I hope you are happy and lucky.

(And when you're sad, don't always chat with others (especially acquaintances). But you can chat with me! At most, I'll just ignore you, hehehe, just kidding!)

That's all.